And Finally

A woman has availed herself of the ancient Norman rite of Clameur de Haro in an attempt to stop the narrowing of a road in Guernsey. Rosie Henderson invoked the clameur by kneeling and crying for help and reciting the Lord's Prayer, in Norman French.

A new mother was reported to authorities the day after the birth of her child after she tested positive for opiates - having eaten a poppyseed bagel. Elizabeth Eden had to be monitored by a caseworker for five days after the birth of her daughter because of the results.

A man attempted to take his driving test with a stash of marijuana and drug money in the car. Reginald D. Wooding Jr, 22, was gearing up for his test when the examiner smelled the drug and alerted an officer.

A fisherman has been fined for lying to police about being attacked – so that officers would give him a lift home. Matthew McAtasney, 19, claimed to have been kicked and punched last year.

The BBC is going to court in a bid to force Microsoft help track down the source of a Doctor Who leak. A 53-second clip of Jodie Whittaker as the series' iconic lead character, The Doctor, was leaked online in June.

A man racked up over €40,000 in motoring fines in under four hours after racing through the streets in a hired Lamborghini. The man, believed to be a British and in his early 20s, rented the Huracan sports car while holidaying in Dubai, The Times reports.

A man called the police after a kangaroo crashed through his living room window in the middle of the night and upended his home. Instead of being arrested for breaking and entering, the young kangaroo was bundled away by animal rescuers and taken to a nearby shelter.

A judge ordered that a man in court's mouth be duct-taped after he interrupted proceedings a dozen times. Judge John Russo, in Cuyahoga County, Ohio, warned Franklyn Williams, 32, to be quiet at least 12 times over the course of 30 minutes.

The world's most prestigious mathematics medal has been stolen just half an hour after it was awarded. The Fields medal was stolen from Caucher Birkar, one of the four joint winners of the award commonly called the "Nobel Prize of Mathematics".

The PSNI has publicly shamed a member of the public who called 999 to complain that their local tanning salon had closed. The caller wanted to know "how they could claim back their unused 25 minutes", police said on Facebook.