And finally… Happy Ending for lacklustre law career

A lawyer who quit the profession because he was ‘average’ and saw ‘no potential for very large potential gain’ has hit the jackpot by setting up a business producing masturbation devices for the burgeoning self-abuse market.

Thirty-five year old Brian Sloan, turned his back on the law when he “realised that lawyers rent their brains out by the hour, not unlike prostitutes renting out their bodies by the hour.”

He added, “Even worse, I knew I would be only an average or at best slightly above average lawyer, competing against people who could much more efficiently work through legal problems.”

Mr Sloan decided to design his own sex toys and his company now has an £8 million turnover.

Among his inventions is ‘Autoblow 2’ an “oral sex-simulating robot” for which he attracted crowd funding. It has become his company’s bestseller with 90,000 devices sold online.

His other inventions are ‘Slaphappy’, a flat bendable vibrator and an item called ‘3Fap’ which modesty prevents us from describing.

Mr Sloan manufactures his products in China and markets them worldwide online. His mother has overcome her embarrassment at her son’s activities (he once organised a ‘scrotal beauty contest’) and he now claims that she is supportive of his business.

The American entrepreneur is now writing a book. He told news.com.au: “Personally though I’m writing a guide on how others can be successful with an online business. I’d like to share my experiences with people and hopefully positively influence other people who are thinking about a life of entrepreneurship.

“My work may well be perverted or obscene, that’s the fun part. I’ve always had a strange sense of humour.”

  • Contributions from ILN readers to our “And finally” section are welcome – they should be sent to: newsdesk@irishlegal.com
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